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| October 13, 2006 Barnstable Patriot |  |
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Here is a film that should
have every one'sinner geek
excited. Wolverine, Storm
and Dr. Xavier are back!
Unfortunately, Bryan
Singer, comic book lover
and director of the first two
films, is not. Calm down,
calm down. For you see,
there is a new director. His
nameisBrett Ratner.Wait...
isn't he the guywho directed
the Rush Hour movies?? Oh,
my god. This is going to be
terrible!
Well, sort of good news.
X-Men: The Last Stand isn't
that bad. It lacks the soul
and emotional power of
the first two directed by
Singer, but Ratner does an
admirable job in the action
parts.
The last stand takes place
shortly after the last film.
Jean Grey died but has been
resurrected in this one as
the sociopathic Phoneix.
While the X-Men are trying
to figure out how to best
help Phoenix, the govern-
ment announces they have a
cure that would restore the
mutants to normal Homo
sapiens,
Thisiswhere the film gets
interesting.The mutantsbe-
gin to fight amongst them-
selves as they try to figure if
the government is going to
force them to be cured or
given the choice. Magneto
takes no chancesandbegins
to raise an army of mutants
to do battle withthe govern-
ment.EventheX-Menthem-
selves are dubious about
whether the government
will make this mandatory.
The events unfurl and lead
up to an awesome battle
sequence at the end.
My onlyproblem with the
film is that, under Ratner's
direction. X-Men: United
lacks the emotional punch
that Singer's films had; the
deaths of certain mutants
seem glib rather than dev-
astating. I enjoyed X-Men:
The Last Stand very much
but wish that Singer had
directed this final film in the
series instead.
Feast
Matt Damon and Ben
Affleck helped produce
a reality television series
titled Project Green light
in which they gave aspiring
directors and screenwriters
the opportunity to write
and direct a movie. The
result, a fascinating look
at the making of a film,
the infighting, ego clashes
and how studio executives
manage to stifle the cre-
ative process in order to
produce safe "been there,
seen it before "mainstream
films.
With the first two films
from the series being box
office disasters and the
show itself suffering dwin-
dling ratings , the show
moved from coming of age
films to horror films. The
result was perhaps one of
the most fascinating and
entertaining seasons (as
well as the last season) of
the ratings-deficient Proj-
ect Green light.
While the television show
was entertaining and inter-
esting, the final product ,
Feast, is not. Perhaps this
isbecause, as we see during
the television show, when
the contestant's scripts are
narrowed down to three ,
the big-shot Hollywood
producers pick the worst
(something they freely ad-
mit) because they feel it is
the easiest to market.
Perhaps the second rea-
son is that the screenwrit-
ers seem to have blatantly
ripped off From Dusk To
Dawn. All the action takes
place in a remote seedy
bar. The characters are
assorted low-lifes and the
mayhem is over the top.
The worst thing about
the film is that the cuts are
so fast you can't really tell
what is going on. You don't
care about the characters
because none is ever fully
fleshed out and there are
so many that when some
appear again you wonder
where they came from.
Feast does have some
good moments but overall
it's really only worth seeing
for fans of the television
show Project Green light ,
all seven of you.
Black Dawn
America'sfavorite pudgy
pugilist is back. Steven Se-
gal stars in this entertain-
ing -yes, that's right, en-
tertaining- action flick. He
even looks like he may have
dropped a few pounds.
In Black Dawn , our mas-
ter of flabitsu stars as Jon
Cold. I guess he has that
name because he is "so cool
he's cold" or maybe the
writers realized that Jon
Flu or Jon Sinus-Infection
lacked the same punch.
Anyway, Jon Cold is seen
in the beginning of the film
helping a dangerous arms
dealer escape from prison.
He takes ajob working for
the dealer, much to the
dismay of
the CIA by
whom Cold
was once
employed.
As the CIA
tries to
figure out
which side
Cold is on,
a group of
terrorists
enter the
picture in-
tent onbuy-
ing anucle-
ar bomb to
blow up Los Angeles.
Is Cold working for the
arms dealer and ready
to betray his country? Is
he in fact working deep
undercover for the CIA?
These would have actually
been suspenseful ques-
tions if in fact the makers
of the film did not put in
large print right on the
DVD's cover "HE'S THE
ONE THING THE TER-
RORIST DIDN'T PLAN
ON!"
Now I have to admit,
I was originally thinking
along the lines that the
terrorists were having a
brunch and did not expect
Segal to come. I imagined
the line, "He eats like a
hippo. Why did no one
warn us of this man's eat-
ing ferocity?" And when
the terrorists run out
of food, Segal goes into
a punching and kicking
frenzy yelling, "What do
you mean there'sno more
food?!? Now there will be
no more you!!
Then about five minutes
into the film I began to
realize that the tag line on
the box might be referring
to the fact that Segal is a
good guy and goingto fight
the terrorists.
Overall, Black Dawn is
entertaining - not great
though. It moves quickly
and isone of the few movies
in which Segal is actually
kind of bearable.
^OTJlilHSMx-MEN: THE LAST STAND
CONTINUED FROM PAGE C:1
Batzer stole the show on oc-
casion when buffooning it up
with his cast of charges while
dancing and singing much
like the Keystone Cops of
silent-film fame.
Were it not for the spoken
word, we would not have
known the story line of this
operetta. The diction of the
choruses was muddled and
frenzied , though the numbers
were catchy and toe-tapping.
Pirates is the story of a
young man who has just
received word that he is free
to leave the band of unsavory
pirates he has been hanging
around with for years. Unfor-
tunately a miscalculation has
occurred and he must remain
instate. In the short time he
is free he falls in love with a
young gal, daughter of the Ma-
jor, and tries to make a go of
the romance despite the silly
difficulties that thwart him.
If you've never seen Pi-
rates of Penzance, now is
your chance. If you can put
blinders on regarding age
you might be delighted, for
there are several pluses to
the production. The set is a
delightful surprise, especially
in the second act when light-
ing by Peter Earle is a kalei-
doscope of colors that brings
the setting to elevated life.
The costumes by Pam Banas
and John Duble are simply
lovely, especially those worn
by the young girls who bring
elegance and innocence to the
front. And if you have a sense
of humor, you will be particu-
larly delighted when you see
the Major General dressed in
bedroom attire sporting some
accoutrements not the norm
for comfortable sleeping.
The cast tries hard and their
efforts are not wasted; they are
just wasted on this aged show
that does not highlight any of
there talents but casts them off
into the old captain's chest that
is long forgotten.
Pirates of Penzanceplays at the
Academy of Performing Arts, 120
Main St. in Orleans, through Nov. 5
with performances Thursday through
Saturday at 8 p.m. (except Oct. 26) and
Sunday at 2 p.m. For tickets ($18), call
508-255-1963.
Academy's Pirates...
NOWPLAYING
REGAL THEATERS
MAN OFTHE YEAR (PG-13)
Fri.- Thu. (1250 405) 710 945
THE MARINE(PG-13)
Fri.- Thu. (1230 335) 720 930
THE GRUDGE 2 (PG-13)
Fri. -Thu. (100 410) 715 940
DEPARTED(R) (OC) (DA)
Fri. (1230) Sat. (340) Sun. (1230) 1000
Mon. (1230) 700
DEPARTED(R)
Fri. (100 340 415) 700 7451000
Sat. (1230 100 415) 700 7451000
Sun. (100 340 415) 700 745
Mon. (100 340 415) 745 1000
Tue.- Thu.(1230 100 340 415) 700 7451000
THE GUARDIAN (PG-13)
Fri.-Thu. (1235 340) 7051000
OPEN SEASON (PG)
Fri.-Thu. (1245 400) 735 935
JETLI'S FEARLESS(PG-13)
Fri. -Thu. (1240 320) 700 925
EMPLOYEEOFTHE MONTH (PG-13)
Fri.- Thu. (1240 355) 725 950
TEXASCHAINSAW MASSACRE:
THE BEGINNING (R)
Fri.- Mon. (1250330) 740 955
Tue.(1250) 740 Wed. (330) 740
Thu.(1250) 740
JACKASS: NUMBERTWO(R)
Fri. - Thu.(110345) 730 940
SCHOOL FOR SCOUNDRELS (PG-13)
Fri. - Thu. (105 325) 730 950
TEXAS CHAINSAWMASSACRE:
THE BEGINNING (R) (OC)
Tue.(330)955 Wed. (1250) 955 Thu.(330) 955
DEPARTED (R) Digital -
Fri. - Thu. (1250 400) 730
THE GRUDGE 2 (PG-13)
Fri. - Sat. (110 430) 710 945
Sun. - Thu. (110 430) 710
THE GUARDIAN (PG-13) Digital -
Fri. - Thu. (100 410) 740
THE MARINE (PG-13)
Fri. - Sat. (130 440) 720 950
Sun. - Thu. (130 440) 720
TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE:
THE BEGINNING (R)
Fri. - Sat. (135 445) 745 955
Sun. - Thu. (135 445) 745
OPEN SEASON (PG)
Fri. - Sat. (120 420) 700 915
Sun. - Thu. (120 420) 700
DEPARTED (R)
Fri. (345) 715 Sat. - Sun. (1235 345) 715
Mon. - Thu. (345) 715
THE ILLUSIONIST (PG-13)
Fri. (315) 705 920
Sat. (1245 315) 705 920
Sun. (1245 315) 705
Mon. - Thu. (315) 705
BOYNTON BEACH CLUB (NR)
Fri. (325) 700 910
Sat. (1255 325) 700 910
Sun. (1255 325) 700
Mon. - Thu. (325) 700
THE HOUSE OF SAND (R)
Fri. (335) 710 930 Sat. (105 335) 710 930
Sun. (105 335) 710 Mon. -Thu. (335) 710
LITTLE MISS SUNSHINE (R)
Fri. (355) 720 925 Sat. (115 355) 720 925
Sun. (115 355) 720 Mon. - Thu. (355) 720
Know the Market.
Know the Town.
Only in
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fyt JBarngtatJlc
patriot
4 Ocean Street
Hyannis, MA 02601
508/771-1427
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CONTINUED FROM PAGE C:1
November bringsthe JuleStyne-Sammy
Cohn High Button Shoes to the stage in
Barnstable village (did you know comic
Phil Silvers and Broadway legend George
Abbott collaborated on the book? ).
Neil Simon's Chapter Two will chase the
snowflakes in January, and Elwood E
Dowd and his big bunny buddy Harvey
will arrive with the spring in March. The
college comedy TTie Hammerstone is on
the boards in May.
Season subscriptions are available. Go
to www.barnstablecomedyclub.com for
details.
Saluting Champlain and the
Wampanoag
The 400th anniversary of Samuel Cham-
plain's encounter with the native Wam-
panoag in what is now Chatham will be
marked Oct. 15 at 2 p.m. when Glenn
Marshall, chairman of the Mashpee
Wampanoagtribal council, speaks at the
Atwood House Museum.A ceremony at
the landing site will follow.
ARTS NOTEBOOK...
CONTINUED FROM PAGE C:1
sion, "I got a pocket full/and a distant
dream/I got a worn out soul/like your
dirty jeans." But that soul stays in
motion, despite indecision. The song
is a metaphor for love and cleansing,
and sticking it through . "Placebo" also
offers fresh images on a love theme,
one that is bittersweet. "You're poison
floating down my artery/that's the story
of how you got inside of me," and "I feel
you/dripping down, but I can't walk
away/I know it's bad for me." These are
story-songs we can all relate to.
So whether relating to us her mes;-
Harvest ball at St. PiusX
The first Harvest Ball, a celebration of
ballroom dancing and a fundraiser for the
St.PiusXSchool-Needy Childrenfund will
be held from 7:30to 10:30p.m. Oct. 14inthe
ParishLife Center at21Barbara St.inSouth
Yarmouth.Singlesandcouplesarewelcome.
Fortickets ($10) , call 508-760-4071 or send
an e-mail to dkmchughto verizon.net.
WHAT, FAWCleaders toJFK
School
Wellfleet Harbor Actors Theater Ex-
ecutive Director Jeff Zinn and Managing
Director Jeffry George were at the John
F. Kennedy School of Government in
Cambridgethis week to attend aseminar
on "Achieving Excellence: An Executive
Leadership Program for Nonprofit Cul-
tural Organizations in Massachusetts."
Amongthe other artsleaders chosen to
participate are executive director Hunter
O'Hanianand program coordinator Doro-
thy Antczak of the Fine ArtsWork Center
in Provincetown.
This is the first of three three-day ses-
sions. Here's hoping the Cape attendees
can concentrate on their studies with all
the movies, plays and books to enjoy in
Harvard Square!
sages of personal or political/social
concerns , singer/songwriter Sara
Leketa is a poetic lyricist to look out
for. Her words are as honest as they
come, and she just lets them fly on
out. Maybe that's why her myspace.
com page says that her band consists
of "me and all the voices in my head... "
Whichever voice she lets out for any
particular song, one won't be disap-
pointed by her lyricism. Maybe not
quite ready for "World Poet" just yet,
but well on her way.
Keep an eye out for her at The Is-
land Merchant on Ocean Street. She'll
be the woman with the guitar. Go find
out why some call the guitar an axe.
•
Meter Man...
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