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BARK8TABX.E PATRIOT.
rt ' t l I SIIK I I KM HV W K D S T S H A Y MO RM K U ,
okc poor ».»5T or t ut m*T nrn< (
j ixo n i B F . c T i .v nrro K i T F . t i i k
Ci;fT >M-Hiu:fr. . rv
S. if. $MCmnl » per squii ie for cadi nddiiinnnl insertion.
Tlicrr is n prritt PRINT .
Talk is good and print is fjood, liul
the best of both is the talk ,that is as good
print—and the print that is as ton.I as
liilk. Tli
i' talk of a reflecting mind will
always be listened to,ami the piinted lu-
cubrations of a ready mind will always be
read with pleasure. A time was ,but that
time is happi
ly p;ist,wlicn books were the
profound xnd solemn companions of a la-
borious and gloomy solitude ; when a
reading man and a talking man were not
one and the same ; when pale faced slu-
:rs from
the {glri* of /i 6t ick-tHokA)^ All |hy ;
pf the pale of rational existence. Now
V.c al
l read,all talk,all wy
/fe; all print ,
and it loAksjj»*if fli'e tjjfte was not far
far qfFwlfcir'
.
^nic suc h /ngejjjjg^i^f«4jll
j|-
mxtrm i
i*,
\who wrote VJvery man ms
oiv, Washerwoman ,nii
^
bt put forth a
work cahecfc' E»ery writer bis o-.vn read-
er.' Not onlyVjf the scliuolQinstor a-
broad,but tho scholar is abiAd, aiybHft
'"ool.s ajc abroad, and,to j Kmqfiy the
i^ords of Shakspeare—•
All the world' i a tc lioo l,
And all the men and wome n merel y ttli oinri
And now print is talkau!* , and talk is
printable. We live in a land of literature
and breathe a learned »»ir,and the waters
of knowledge no longer bottled up in seal-
ed bottles,but are diffused through the at-
mosphere in a form of an impartial and
universal dew ;and there is no sty le ol
tnlk that the world loves so well and
that meets with so ready a reception, as
that which has to do with books,which
is redolent of print ;and llws, next com-
mon place,after the weather,
*s the last
book or the last book but fifty. Nor a-
gain, is there any style of print mor«
acceptable than that which savors of talk
and is full of the living interests of human,
ily. So far from despising, as beneath
Its notice,a book of mere talk,
the work
receives with greedy glee, the most per
feet coHoqtiialitie* of composition, W<
do not creep into holes and corners of
the earth to commune with profound ab-
stractions ,or to peruse most learned trea-
tises,sitlins: «ilh seminimlar spine, and
elbows on the table , and hands pressed
upon the forehead,and eye-brows ri gid-
ly knit into the painfu l semblance of pro-
found coniemp laiioii , but we sit with n
Irii'iul,sweel ly at ease ,recumbent on a so-
la, lounging in a chair ;or we walk with
it as a |iorl.ili|t - pei ip.itelic philosop her,
which teai'lies as we ;;o ;or we sland w ilh
it as a gos .M|iin
g companion ,by the fire-
side,and we love to inniM iir in our rend-
ing the voice dl i for-
get t>ur books in our intercouiri 1 with
the worl d. Hut we are not so profiuiud
astln> men o) lolios in the generations tlia
are pone by ;so much the belter. We i
are not so stu pilied— we are n.it so pe-
dantic— we are not so tempestuous—ere-
iiieutical : we are m ire lunniini/.ed, niort1
sociabli' ; we have bnisln d away the dust
of literature ,and rubbed oil" the rust of il-
literairncKS. Literal lire has come forth
Irom iis monaslerv ,and renounced its ce-
libacy. Our modern Minerva is not a
spinster btil a queen ; jiml so I
'.ir
from bring nn up- of superficial, Iho
present is an iige of deepened ,literature
—ol infused and diffused intelligence.—
The great reservoirs are broken up, and
iusiend <>l tiithntnless stagnant pools, we
have cheei ful and fertilizing streams. —
We are not profound — pish ! we are bel-
ter titan pro found- We h.ive a literature
tl i.it w e cm uiiike use of — t h a t we enn 1111-
derderstand—that We can talk about —
that we can bring to our tables and fire-
sides— that we ciiu shate with our fami-
lies and enjoy with our friends. We a'c
not lumbered with a n.
veless incuinbiaiice
but we ate furnished with what we can
nee ,an d with (hat therefor)! the mind
niiiv be embellished. Literature is hu-
man— it is of die ri^'lit manly ( lenient —
an d in sp ite iiftbe I.Miieiilatioiis nf lliose
w ho reg-ird the pres* nt as the dregs ol
past gl"l'\', and tile |iioli)ise ol future mis-
chief,we view it w i'.b a pleasant a ppro-
bation , as liiriuiti'; a p:.ictical comment
on I
'nj x-'s never to Ije forgotten ma .xiin :
Tlic propel stud y of m.lllli inr l is m ill.
I',i.in ili>. N V < Mi-irllnduit.
FIRST OF A I*111 I/ JOK KH.
Ai. w 1'fiiiK April -1 !.-;>ily of my uncle Silverlo;) were all
blown to the ntoou. Hut I baflled the
malice of inv fust of A pril correspondent
lot I demanded and received back tin
povlage .
On my lelurn I poj tl into an apothe-
car y 's >.h(ip and inquired the pi ire of (i'/ ua
fi 'ltllrxlii It. * Two and sixpence a yard ,'
i.'plied I
'eslle ,promptl y ; • but we sold
ill'' last not half an hour ago. Delight-
ful weaihci',this. W' <- bavej ust import-
ed a new article , a kind of cephalic snuff,
very i-fli'-acious in verti go and tin tied head;
i( u called pv h'is tturczntuin . Will you
take a pii.cli r' This was spoken in so
crave aii(i genteel a manner ,that 1 ha J no
su' .|iicioii of any trick ! and taking as
(illicit (pf the puh 'is snrrzn(ii>n »s I could
cle verl y bold between my thumb and fin-
ger , ithrew it far up my nose,and found
it was ca yenne pepper a little disguised
ttilh pulverised charcoal. J rubbed my
nose till the skin was ,off,and thought the
juke was too smart for me.
As 1 was ciossiti'i the street ,Ieucouri-
lered a gentleman tiding horseback , and
said to liim ; " Mister ,your horse 's girth
is under bis belly.' He sto pped short to
examine the case , and hearing me. burst
into a horse laugh,he seeme d to recol-
lect it was (In- first of A pril, and giving
afte'u.lianl cut with bis riding whi p, In:
^t
rrrflM n Idid'nt t hink much of that
^
almnv i^iu , i uiu ui iiiui n uhkh ui uiiii
joke, *"
Inext poked my head into a thread and
noodl
e store ,and observing an old lady
KrUrng dei uin ry in one corner, I asked
her gravely for the thread of Mr. MufTil'*
last discourse. Capital quiz,that ,was 'm
it i Dill the old lady was up to a trap.—
Says she,• J'm xtr y sorry to say 1 can 't
accommodateyou for true as I
'm alive ,
MJiter,the thread took fire in (he middle
of the sannunt,and ni
l burnt up.
Ihad just left the thread and needle
store,w hen Imet with my cousin Mar-
garet Mullikeii. ' Maggy,' says I
there's a spot on your face as big as a dol-
lar !' Dont vou thin k she went into fits ?
No such thing ; she did'nt even pay my
joke the compliment of giving a maiden-
ly screech. 'Why,Harry,
you silly dunce,
'
says she,
'you're al
l over spot.' • Yoore
too k«en for me,
'says I
,' Idon't know
what fool is'nt,
'retorted she,
; and with
thes« compliments we passed on.
« Du you see that flock of wild geese ?'
said Ito the next man I
mel. « Where /'
said he. * Why don'
t yon see them there ?
said I
,a little lo the northeast.' ' Icant
say Ido,
'replied h",putting on his glas-
ses ; 'I'm r,Mher near sighted.' ' Look
just ovt r them buildings there,
' sji ul 1.—
I
ly this lime a large crowd had gathered
rou iid, an d were earnestly gazin;: in the
tlii'(lion to which I pointed , whe n an
old huckster woiirni came up and asked
w hat was there. ' A flock of wild geese ,
Ma 'nni ,' s.iys I ' Wild geese !
' exclaim-
ed she,in a ci acke d voice— 'you look
more like a panel of tame ones, and I'll
lie bound your 'e a ll a pack of A piil fools."
This rather unequivocal him ,,f ( |
l(. ,,ld
woman 's brought the cro wd lo iln ir recol-
lect ion, and a sudden dispi'tsiou took
place . I letreate d along wild ihe rest ;
for. thoug h I had succedi'd in deceiving
i mult itude , 1 h.id no desire to encounter
«ils sinyle handed with a huckster wo-
man.
1 had by this timei;ot over mv iingei
with my wife and Kilty for oui-looling tin
a nd I returned home to dinner. 1 wa>
now pretty well satisfied with my ever
lions ,and determined to rest on tin- glo-
ries IIi.kI won. Dinner was at lengili
brought in,and recollecting the events ol
the Him niii'j ,1 took a slnirp surxcy ol
the countenance of my wife and Kiltey,
to see if they had any farther (ticks in
store lot me. Hut ,a lter the most exact
scrut iny, I coul d not delect the smallest
pa rticle of lurking mischief. I conclu-
ded that they had ceased fioni their fool-
eries and that I should enj oy my hum]
in quiet. In fact ,eve ry tiling passed oil
for a time very well,until the dessert wa.-
produced ; when my wife, with her usu-
al sweet look ,asked u hied, I would pre-
fer, custard or cranberry (art ? ' Cranber-
ry tart ,my dear , sai d I
. ' K ilty, ' sai d
my wi fe,' In in:
; Mr. Jio bson a piece ol
the cran berry til t. ' My wile knew thai
I was particularly fond of cr.inbery tail.
As soon as it w.is set before me, I com-
mence d operations by laking a large
mouthful,and found it was made of poke-
berries ! Iat fust eudeavoicd lo laug h ;
liul presently ,t hinking my wile 's joken
bad gone tar i'Ik >u;rh , Iconclu ded to as-
sert lite dignity uf my stat ion and accord-
ingly asked her with a srvete lone, what
( bed — I she meant. " You might bavr
ba d custard ,
' sai d she ," if you bad pic-
Icired it ; but you chose the ctanbury
tart — it was • Jlobson 's choice. ' This pun
upon my name quite overcas t mv risin g
chiller. I like si |>" in ••-niii i io imvs (, ' My
dear , a Iruct .1 to any more fooleries ; let 's
kiss and be friends.' ' W ilh all my heart ,
'
said my wife. The bargain was ratified
ani l the salute was given with Midi hearty
good will,lliat llnf report Maitlr d some
doves which were billing and cooing on
the eaves of llie adjoining bouse .
I spent llie remain der of the day in
quid,neither fooling nor hein-j; fooled—
at |e,isl until the hour of retiring to rest ,
when le paitiug lo the kitchen to see thai
nil was sa le,as Iopened door ,down came
a bucket of water on mv sconce ! Isei/,-
llii.
1 einplv vessel ,and was about throw-
ing it at Kitty 's bead , when she burst out
a laughing, and said ,' Ah , John is that
you ( I thought I should p.iy you for
your tr icks. ' Perce iving it was the ser-
vant , man,and not me , for whom sin.
'
had suspended the well filled bucket
1 merely reminded her of the mistake ,
when .she begged ten thousand paidou.*.
But 1 believed in my luail the jiiiii' was
not al all sorry for die result of iln; joke .
Thus ,Mr. L'diior,Ifinished the firm of
A pril,an d res'ilved in the end that Ihad
little cans'- to boast of my success. Iwas
now wel as a drowned rat , my hea d was
broke uilli llie bucket ,and a suit ol clothes
wh ich the day before bad cost me fifty
dollars , was nearly .ruined. Ibad eaten
salt petre for table salt , and poke-berries
fur cranbfiry tail ;1 bud filled my nose.
wilh r.iiyeune pepper,under tin.
1 attractive
name of j mlvis Hiici 'zi'Otii m, and in older
to alla y llie smart ,bad rubbed it till the
ik iu was off ; Ibad drank a decoction
of old shoes for co/ii;e,and hikery pikery
for wine ;Ihad been deceived by a mon-
key, and outwitted by a parrot ;anil wbal
ba d Igained i Nothing but the equivo-
cal ho nor of making fooK of a few half-
witted people. Yours ,Ait.
IIAK ItY I1OUSON.
A Vernionlrr .—U we beli eve one
half of the anecdotes told of Vermor.tem,
they must be a shrewd people. The fol-
lowing is a fact, __
A few winters since ,one of those sons
of the mountain stopped at a public house
in Massachusetts ,on his way to Boston ,
with the produce of bis farm. V» hen \m
horses and himself were sufficiently re-
freshed,he drew a purse from hi* pocket
formed from the skin of a weasel, and
made known his desire of discharging his
bill. Mine host looked wishfull
y at the
silver,as it escaped from its singular con-
finement ;but turning resolutely from the
temptation,he said,
—' Look, here , MU>-
ter,
there is a turnpike gute a, few rods
ahead ;the mun who tends it told a tra-
veller that my house was not fit
for a hog pen. nn') thus lost me a custo-
mer. Now if you will get through the
gate without paying toll, 1 wont charge:
you n cent for wh;it you have had. ' A-
gt eed,
" said tin? Ver monter retuting his
money into the weasel skin and the wea-
sel skin to his pocket— ' I
'
l l do it or pav
you double." He was soon underway ,
in«.
',
'—an d again lugging forth his wea-
sel skin , was about satisfying the man of
lolls . The letter of the eonlract was in-
deed fulfilled. The man ol bodies look-
ed blank ,and sneaked away to his bar ,
mullerisig to himsel f,' What a fool Iwas
I might have known he'd play some
tr ick en me ; I never knew a Yerinonter
at a loss yet.'
I
'pon explaining tin? matter to tin? toll-
nallirr ,he insiste d upon bis passing on
l
ice of expense.
ll'ar Dc/Hirtmni t, Pension O
jj ice.
April l.
r>f/i, is;5 1.
Under the act of March 1. IS.'1
.
) , the
the following rules \v,\w- been adopted :—
If the 1
'eiisioner has died, mid left
a widow , llie balance of bis pension be-
longs lo her ;il he left no widow ,or she
be dead, lo tin- children of the pensioner;
il no child or children,then to the legal
representative of the deceased.
A widow claiming a balance must prove
her relationshi p to ihe deceased belore a
Court of Itccord ,show the period of his
dentil , and that he was a pensioner ol
ibel' uiled Stales.
Children must prove before a Court of
llecord, that the deceased was a pension-
er of the Unite I Stales ,show the period
of bis di'.itli, and that hi: left no widow ,
or that she be dead , that they are his
children ,and ace ol'nge.
A certi ficate of the facts proved must
be obtained from the clerk of the Court.
It is not necessary for the clerk to give
t in1 evidence in detail, hot u/i/ y lo Mate
the fads that have been proved,mid cer-
ti fy under his seal oi office that (he testi-
mony adduced was satisfactory to the
Court.
Mxecuiors and administrators must ob-
tain from llie oilkcr who grunts the Idlers
a certi ficate under his seal of office, that
i
l has been proved lo his satisfa ction,that
t here me neither widow nor children of
the deceased.
A new liquid has been discovered by
Mr. Isaiah Jennings ,of New York ,which
he uses as a substitute for Oil in Lamps.
It is described ;n a species of nlchohol ,
mid the advantages it possesses over oil
are said lo cons ist in its cheapness , ntid
the fact that il never chills, and that no
smoke issues from il. It is transparent.
It never burns (be wick ,und in less dange-
rous , us no sparks have ever been known
to (iML'iniitc there from. There* is no
dripping below ihe but tier ,and no choke
in the tubes. It is not injurious to the
eyes there in no greaye,and is much s-jon-
er l
ighted.
The editor* and proprietors of the Dai-
ly Columbian Ccntiuel ,announce intbeii
paper of May .
'id, the completion of an
arrangement with the editor iind proprie-
tor of llie New-Kngliifid I
' ulladium,by
which those two papers will hcrea/ler be
permanently united.
A project is on foot ,to make a railway
across the Isthmus of Sue/,, an d carr ying
over it vessels of llie heaviest burden from
the Mediterranean to the Red Sea . The
vessels are to be placed on the railway,
out of ihe wafer , by means of Morion'
.
'*
patent slipx, and thence transported to
the opposite sea ,by means of locomotive
steam enjiines. The difficulties are said
to be \v>f. formidable than those which
ha ve bi:»'i) overcome in the construction ol
the Knglish rail-roads ;and the Pacha of
Lgypt is reported to have emp loyed nn
Mutineer to inspect i\u; patent alipH. The
proposition has been submitted in a ptip-
er read before llie Society of Arts in Lou-
don. Thus (he rail-way mania—for we
cannot yet bring ourselves to look nt it in
any other l
ight—is diffusing itself ovtr
the world,and seems likely to spread un-
til it shall have cured itself by some sud-
den and irreparable explosion.—Nation-
al Journal.
A country jeweller advertising, that he
had a numbei of precious stone* to dit-
p-,se u(,declared that they sp«rklcd like
a young widow 's tears.
Cadiz.—A duty of &4 per barrel un
salt provisions ha* been laid at the |*Or1
of C'i
t ^ir »'¦t»k" < {T'T» !M M>r<-> !'
-"''
At i\ town meeting, held in Salem,cal-
led for Iho pinpose of ncting npon n pp-
tilion to reconsider the vote of the town
passed nt n previous meeting respecting
Cows gninrr ul |:lrj,
(,O1, „ ,
m,tj v,
,
, t|
,nt the
subject be indefinitely postponed, Judpc
Cummins made the following remtivks
which we copy fmin the HeRistei- :—
Jiiilflt' Cummins state d to the meelinj!
thnl it mUtmiliTNimulinr: prevailed in re
I'ard to tl-e subject of cattle going ul lurg(
on the l
ii'hwavs,without u keeper,wen
w rongfully there ,und ns much trespassers
as if they entered (Ik* wardens or fields ol
persons not the owners of such cattle.—
lie was a wai'e llmt u praclice had grown
up lo pet mil cows lo go al large? in the
slreeis and highways ,but it was a prac-
lice not authorized by the law. Without
llie eimsenf of the to wn ,ctitilo cannot go
nt l.ii ;
'
,!
1, and every instance of animal be-
in;- let loose on the public, highways is u
violation of the h»\v - Judge C. then cit-
ed the cases which bad been decided bv
the Supreme Court ,going to establish this
rule of law. One of the cases was whore
a town refused to puss u vote prohibiting
cattle going at large ,and un action was
brought ugainst the owner of animals
found louse on the highways. The Court
held that the tresptiss lies by the oimri- uf
the.land which in covered by the. high-
mm) —thiit the public, have no other right
to (In: highway than that of passing unil
repussiiig, and that ihe owners of the
land rciiihi all oilier rights— consetjenl-
ly dial no oilier person has (he right «>I"
pasturage in such highway, and by turn-
ing out cattle to pasture in (he highways,
a trespass is committe d. The remedy
of the ciii/.ens is therefore plain, eithe r
with or without a vote of the town. They
ca n detain any cattle (,
'oin(» til huge.
David Koherts , Kst piire, thought as
Judge Cummins had clearly shown tin
regulation adopted by a vote at the pre-
vious meeting to be entirely unnecessary,
a mere surplussagc , as the law had al-
ready provided for llie case ,that the voli
had belter be rescinded.
A coquette at a ball' asked a gentle-
man who was adjusting her tucker , if he
could////"/ a fun ' No madam ,
' answered
lie,proceediii)' to use it,'but 1 ciuij 'an u
flirt.
A (j iiack doctor mid a knavish lawyer
were disputing about precedence. Let
the thief go before, und the executioner
follow,said a bystander.
Lord Clicstcrficld'H physicians having
informed liim that he was dying ' by in-
ches ,
'he tha nked heaven that he was not
no tall by u foot ns Sir Thomas Robin-
son.
Judge Cummins explained—he did not
mean to state thai the vote of the town
was of! ho force,on the contrary, it was
of essential importance,as it was in fur-
theniiice of the law,providing for its ex-
eeillii 'ii ,—i\'.C.
N O T 1 V K .
rM^ HK Milet ciibi -r* li'ive I'minnl u f/)|)Hrfnrr-
J /' klii |, ioiil ivjI iu/ij iMu i OuJuMieio* inline** ,
u.Wcr i*iinii rt*~"'¦"''
''
fc^ inoKAf.'f: HamnERfc en,
No. 'I, Oiiirnl w hiirf , l
i otlou.
ifOHACK SCUPJIKK,
.lAMK rt IIUCKINd.
*.. _
HORACE SOUDBXra Sc 00.
NO. 4,Cr.KTiui.'Wii*ur,
HOSTOK,
W I
I/l. V.rr\t cointnntiy oil h»n«l »n«l ('X «uln
IIU N N INd U lf i t i l N U uf«M*!*<•»,
—MANILLA IIOFIC, HVUS- YAHN. fcf "«
rci»il.—Oapq» ur Riuoj*" , CablkM , ''***
kk»,h*.from the manufactory of J^*l»h Ilot>-
biiii,Kiq. of Plymouth.
«»« be furjil«h« n any
f|»Bflllty M »liort nutic«, ho«1 on l»l>W"» uinni,
by appl
ying •» above.
March it,1831. "__
V
f OTtOJL
TiUmv ,Jn«li»M n»U Itnvi nif 1» pocscsiton
BOOK B, M«nJ »X rn '"" > •** <°«*'P»*0«-.
Mv>, Uy Ic.nnf. *iih Jtiii. ,